A Good Day to Die Hard

Wonderful, brainless action combined with the humor one expects from a Die Hard movie.

This time around, John McClane is in Moscow to aid (or so he thinks) his estranged son. What he doesn't know, however, is that McClane junior is a key player in a covert CIA operation. The botched (thanks to McClane sr.) mission takes us after Moscow to the only other place in the former Soviet Union that the average US American might have heard of - Chernobyl.

The story, of course, doesn't matter. The fillm is loaded with expolsions, shoot-outs, double-crossing, villains dancing, McClanes jumping off buildings and a car chase that has them destroy a string of vehicles along the way.

For everyone worried about Bruce Willis getting too old for this shit - he has a son! The franchise is secure!

4/10

Chernobyl Diaries

This film is crap. So much of it does not make sense.

I get why one would get a kick out of going to the site of the Chernobyl disaster. I wouldn't but I do get it. There is probably some excitement to going there illegally with a freelance tour guide called Yuri.

However, why this Yuri character would run off in the dark because people are bothered by a sound that may or may not be a baby is not as cut and dried to me. Especially, why he would speed off in some random direction is beyond me.

Even more baffling is one of the Americans going after him for no apparent reason, and unarmed.

What follows is a lot of running to and fro and getting hunted by wild dogs, that turn out to not be the actual menace hiding at the site.

No, when radioactivity comes into play, cue the mutants. Human mutants, that is. There are also the experiment-happy doctors to 'treat' them. And they wonder why the survivors of the Chernobyl disaster would be upset by the film. Seriously? You portray them as fucking mutants. Of course they are upset.

Then we never even get a good look at the mutants because everything is all dark and quickly cut and obscure.

But the most irritating thing is the ending. The military comes in and shoots one of the two survivors but takes the other one to their hospital to - wait for it - feed her to the mutants. What? You couldn't just have shot her, as well? Or offer both up as food?

Makes. No. Sense.

On the plus side, this features the cute guy from $#*! My Dad Says.

1/10 (and I'm being generous here)