Guardians of the Galaxy

What to do on a rainy day in New York City? Watch a film, of course.

Now, on paper, I should not enjoy a film like Guardians of the Galaxy. I have never been much of a sci-fi fan to begin with and I am so over comic book films and superheroes. But, you know what...it was fun.

What set it apart from the pack for me were the raccoon, Groot, and the Awesome Mix of (mostly) 1980s tunes.

Most of the full-on action scenes were downright stupid and I don't quite see the point of disguising a handsome man like Lee Pace. I mean if you got it why not show it off, ya know? Fortunately, it was also very funny (Groot FTW).

Of course, I couldn't retell the story if my life depended on it. Something with a metal globe that everyone wanted to get their hands on and the main character turned out to be much more genetically blessed than he appears...and he appears just fine, thankyouverymuch.

Zoe Saldana is showing up a different hue this time around. Here she is green instead of blue. Seriously, girlfriend needs to find herself a film that does not play in outer space.

7/10

American Hustle

I do not get everybody's infatuation with David O. Russell. Never mind that the guy is reportedly an asshole but his films are mediocre, at best. Like this one. Granted, American Hustle is far superior to the last of his products that has been shoved down our collective throats, Silver Linings Playbook, but that is not saying much.

Like its predecessor, American Hustle apparently cannot decide whether it wants to be a comedy or a drama. In my opinion, it is neither. Let's just agree to calling it a crime caper. Don't get me wrong, it has its moments and Jennifer Lawrence is actually very good in this (yes, I called her very good), now that she is allowed to play something other than the defiant young woman of all her previous roles.

As for the comedy part (or attempt of it)...the actors are made to look as ridiculous as possible (unnecessarily so), except for Amy Adams, who is as scantily dressed as possible. There is a dance part and some singing (both uncalled for). The drama comes in when several love triangles develop among the characters. It gets even sappy at parts (the Amy Adams character revealing to the Bradley Cooper character that she has been using a false name but 'this, this is real'). Also, it has endless voice overs (which I don't care for).

The story itself is about a couple of con artists that get caught and are forced to help the feds con other people (including one very honest and likable politician) but actually end up conning the feds. It drags on forever and the plot gets lost in the smugness of it all.

Could have easily been a good half hour shorter. I kinda wish it had been.

4/10

...which brings us to our Best Picture Oscar nominees update:
Gravity
Captain Phillips
12 Years a Slave
American Hustle

The Hangover Part III

The third part of the comedy series has something the second part didn't - a plot.

It starts with Alan's family and friends staging an intervention. The wolf pack sets out to take him to a treatment facility in Arizona. On the highway they get pushed off the road by a truck and then brought in front of one Marshall, who has some beef with the evil genius that is Mr. Chow. Chow recently escaped from a Thai prison and has disappeared before Marshall could get back the gold Chow had stolen from him earlier. The only one that has had contact with him, apparently, was Alan.

Doug gets taken (again) by Marshall, who threatens to kill him unless Alan, Phil and Stu bring him Chow. The search leads them first to Tihuana and, after unwittingly assisting Chow in stealing the remainder of Marshall's gold, once again in Las Vegas.

The wolf pack manages to return the villain to Marshall, but soft hearted Alan saves Chow's life, giving him 'a fighting chance'. Marshall and company bite bullets.

And Alan finds romance! Good for him!

6/10

The Words

This is a story about a book about a book.

Let me explain:
Author Dennis Quaid wore a book about wannabe author Bradley Cooper who found a manuskript inside a leather bag his wife bought for him while on honeymoon in Paris. The manuskript is, of course, awesome. Bradley Cooper, not scheming or anything, types it into his computer (like you do). His wife Zoe Salander 'finds' it and tells him how wonderful it is.

It finally gets him an agent and success. The original author, Jeremy Irsons, one day walks into a bookstore and stumbles upon the book that he wrote. He follows Copper into Central Park one day to talk to him about the hi-jacked book. Or rather, he tells him his life story (the story in the book). Why? Not sure. It's not like he wants anything for it, it seems.

And Dennis Quaid reads all this to an audience that includes grad student Olivia Wilde, who is, like, totally intrigued by the tale and ends up in Quaid's apartment (of course). When he tells her the ending (Cooper comes clean to his wife and publisher, but they all keep mum and enjoy the money reaped fromt he stolen book), Wilde is for some reason unhappy with it, because that is not what she expected or wanted.

Whatever.

3/10

Silver Linings Playbook

Every year, relatively early, the buzz for the sometimes long off award season starts about a small movie (or, small compared to the other contenders). It gets heaps of accolades and everyone agrees that it is so good and deserving of a best picture nomination at every award ceremony, including the Oscars. And then when I watch it, it turns out to be merely ok.

A year ago, that film was The Descendants, the year before it was The Kids Are All Right, before that it was Up in the Air. Ever since the academy descided to throw more films into the best picture circus, as a rule this  film would end up in it. 2012, that film is Silver Linings Playbook.

It is advertised as a comedy/drama/romance. Somehow I totally missed the comedy part. Nothing about it is in any way comedic. Ok, there is some drama and a really weird romance between the bi-polar Bradley Cooper and the widowed Jennifer Lawrence.

Ah yes, Jennifer Lawrence, every critic's new darling. I like her fine, but I have seen her in three films so far, and she has played the same role in every single one of them - hard shelled, mouthy young woman. This worked great in Winter's Bone and it is perfect for The Hunger Games. In Silver Linings Playbook her character is bordering on annoying.

Jackie Weaver is decent in this, Robert DeNiro is his usual great self, Bradley Cooper is surprisingly good (I'm usually not a fan).

This is not as good as they say.

1/10

The Midnight Meat Train

Photographer Leon (Bradley Cooper) is out one night to take more significant photos, because gallery owner Susan Huff (Brooke Shields) didn't like his initial batch. He encounters a threatening situation and takes pictures of a street gang, rather than helping the woman they are about to assault. But he gets some awesome pics out of it and she gets away because he does eventually alert the bad guys of the surveilance cameras. The woman is a successful model (obivously) and is never heard from again.

The police is not interested in Leon's photos (luckily, Susan Hoff is) or the fact that he saw her right before she disappeared. The model becomes one of many victims by a big ass butcher (Vinnie Jones). Leon gets obsessed with disappearing stories and starts following the butcher. We all know how that is bound to end.

Some random thoughts:

Leon lives with his girlfriend in a rather stylish, if smallish appartment. He appears to not really make any money and she is a waitress, no idea how they get by.

It is based on a Clive Barker short story (and those are mostly awesome), so it could only have ended with some creatures in the subway tunnels.

Vinnie Jones is awesome!

Bradley Cooper is not.

3/10