Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs

Dopey is the best of the dwarfs. Hands down.

Let's just get that out of the way.

So, there is a lot of singing. That was to be expected. But Snow White does not only sing, she also speaks in rhyme. And she whistles (while she works)! Also, she is very ditzy. But the girl knows how to keep house, you have to give her that.

The evil presence - the nemesis, if you will - is the step mother and/or witch. Cleverly disguised as, well, a witch she comes to call upon poor innocent Snow White to take care of the girl herself, after her trusted huntsman failed to kill the princess. That sap!

This film was made in much more innocent time, when animated films were aimed at children and the bad people could only be a little scary. It foremost is a kids film, what with all the cute animals and sweet songs and adorable dwarfs.

Beside the queen, the dwarfs and the animals you have everything else of the original fairy tale - the talking mirror, the fake heart, the poisonous apple, Prince Charming. And in the end, good prevails and the scares are kept to a kid friendly minimum.

Well worth seeing, if only for the historical value.

8/10

The Lorax

Here is a perfectly charming adaption of Dr. Seuss's environmental cautionary tale The Lorax. Renders the 2012 version obsolete.

8/10

The Nut Job

I like animated films. I do. But they still need to try a little harder than this.

The story is nothing new - group of animals have to work together but don't realize that their 'leader' (in this case a raccoon) is a total scumbag. They believe everything is for the good of all and listen to everything raccoon says with wide eyed wonder. Then there is the anti-raccoon, a squirrel, who is a bit of a loner and has previously crossed raccoon.

They have to find provision for the winter and it takes a multitude of shitty moves before the group wises up to raccoon's insincerity and the squirrel's bigheartedness. The story plays out with all the usual puns and nothing overly exciting happening that hasn't happened many, many times in some variation before.

There are some cute moments (mostly involving a dog) and an evil little girl scout (who is pretty awesome, to be honest) and a rat that somehow follows the title character squirrel everywhere despite the squirrel being a total asshole to the rat (which is all a front, really, because he actually likes the rat a lot but doesn't want to show so as to not taint his rough-guy front). The rat, by the way, was played by the same rat that was already in Ratatouille (a little worse for wear nowadays).

Meh.

4/10

Frozen

So, a friend tricked me into watching a musical. I don't like 'em and this is what Frozen is - a musical.

Yeah, it's cute and all. It also has all the funny bits one would expect from a Walt Disney animated film. However, whenever it drifted off into being all serious it lost me. I like my animated films funny. Also, that song that won the Oscar for Best Original Song? It annoys the hell out of me.

I know I go against the majority vote but this was all really just "meh" for me.

Sorry.

5/10

Fantastic Mr. Fox

This is an animated film version of Roald Dahl's book of the same name. Of course, in the capable hands of Wes Anderson, this is clearly not aimed at children, even though the dreaded f-word is replaced by the word cussing.

The Mr. Fox in the title was formerly a thief of birds but promised to retire after his wife became pregnant. Life as a newspaper writer, however, does not a happy fox make. Eventually, with the help of the slightly weird Kylie, he breaks his promise and raids not the farms of Boggis, Bunce & Bean.

When the three disgruntled men come after the thieves (and shoot off Mr. Fox' tail), the entire wildlife of the area is effected by the destruction of the habitat. After everyone is initially upset with Mr. Fox, they soon team up to get the humans back by stealing, well, everything.

This leads to all-out war between the animals and the humans and it ends with the animals on the upside. They even steal back the - now detachable - fox tail. The animals move together into the extensive sewer system, that has an exit directly into the Boggis, Bunce & Bean supermarket.

Joy and happiness all around.

Quite entertaining and very weird.

7/10

Hotel Transylvania

Dracula, who has been living in a remote castle raising his daughter Mavis, is preparing a huge party for the girl's 118th birthday. All the monsters imaginable have been invited for the party and opening of Hotel Transylvania. The hotel is supposed to be a save haven for monsters, who have been terrified by humans for centuries.

Years ago, Dracula has promised Mavis that she will be allowed to see the world he has been shielding her from on her 118th birthday. He sends her off to a nearby village, which he had built especially for this occasion to put the fear of humans into her. His zombie employees are dressed up as a mob, coming after the newly arrived vampire. This works and sends Mavis flying home again.

In the midst of the chaos of everyone arriving, a young hapless backpacker finds his way into the castle. Dracula detects him just in time to dress him up as a monster and sneak him into the party when he realizes that he cannot get rid of the human without drawing attention. The human, Johnny, is passed of as a cousin of Frankenstein's right arm, here to plan the party with Dracula.

All the while, he tries to get rid of him without having any of the monsters suspect a human among them. The only one suspicious of Johnny is Quasimodo, alerted by his rat Esmeralda, who can smell the human. Dracula fiddles around to keep Quasimodo and Johnny away from each other and trying to get the party rolling - with games of charade and bingo. Those turn out not to be a party favorite. Whenever Johnny causes mayhem, however, the guests get really into it. Mavis and Johnny, when they first set eyes on each other, fall hopelessly in love.

Dracula still does everything in his power to get rid of Johnny and even reveal to him how he lost his wife Martha in a fire, set by a human mob who discovered that he was a monster. When Quasimodo finally reveals to the party guests that Johnny is, in fact, human, everyone is scared out of their wits. After this, Johnny leaves.

When all the guests try to check out of their rooms at the same time, Dracula, having realized that he only wants his child to be happy, even if that means letting her be with a human, implores his monster friends to forgive him and help him bring Johnny back. When a delegation leaves to drive to the airport, they come to the village during a big monster party (Halloween?) and realize that humans may not be a danger to monsters, after all. They rally up the village people to help get Dracula to the airport as quickly as possible.

Dracula returns with Johnny and a monster-human alliance is formed. Happy faces all around.

6/10

Wreck-It Ralph

A cute little film about video arcade games. And you don't have to know arcade games to enjoy it.

Wreck-It Ralph, the title character, is the bad guy in Fix It Felix Jr. Basically, he spends his time beating down on a building that Felix and his friends live in. Felix, with his magic hammer, fixes it all up again and gets a medal and has cake with all the friends he saved. Ralph, however, lives in a dump all by himself, dreaming of getting a medal himself one day. Then everyone would love him...or at least invite him to the party celebrating the 30th anniversary of the game he is in.

When he takes matters in his own (huge) hands and gets a medal in a game called Hero's Duty he starts total chaos in the game he went rouge in, as well as his own. Felix sets after him to keep them from getting unplugged, along with the tough blond chick from Hero's Duty.

In another game, called Sugar Rush, he encounters a loner, Vanellope, who is kept out of the regular races for being a 'glitch'. After a bad first meeting, that has Vanellope stealing and misusing Ralph's medal, the team up to resurrect Vanellope's avatar and save Sugar Rush from the drones that made it over from Hero's Duty.

Sounds complicated? It's not. It's lovely.

7/10

The Croods

This film about a pre-historic family having to flee its home cave is not officially out yet. I saw it today as a (free) preview.

The Crods consist of the - even now - traditional ingredients: the over-protective father, a somewhat modern mother, the rebellious teenage daughter, the scared son, the aggressively biting baby and the 'still alive' mother in law. When an outsider, Guy, come in and warns them of the coming 'End' they have to follow him towards the sun, where 'tomorrow' lies.

The dimwitted father has the biggest issue with this. His standing as head of the family is threatened when the family starts listening to this newcomer and his daughter is totally smitten with him, as well. After they live through many an adventure together and survive (!) mostly thanks to Guy, they end up on a wonderful beach where they - presumably - live happily ever after, with Guy now firmly implanted in the family and a few pets to boot.

Cute.

6/10

The Lorax

I love Dr. Seuss' books. Wholeheartedly. Most of the film versions, animated or not, I enjoyed a lot (Horton Hears a Who FTW).

Unfortunately, this one falls flat.

Considering this is intended for a very young audience, the story of big business and its exploitation of nature may not go beyond a simplistic human (in the film version) = bad, Lorax (and the trees he represents) = good.

Also, too many musical numbers for my taste.

4/10

Coraline

Coraline Jones is annoyed with her parents and their lack of attention. The both just hover over their computers writing about gardening rather than do some. So when one night she discovers a door into another world where her parents appear to be just what one would wish for, she has no quarrels about going back the next night.

Everything is different there - her mother cooks (imagine!), her father plays the piano and tends to a wonderous garden and her annoying neighbor boy can't talk. Fun!

Of course, something about all this is not right. For starters, everyone has buttons instead of eyes. Soon enough. Caroline realizes that they want her eyes as well and replace them with buttons.

Eventually, Caroline gets lost between her two worlds and must find her real parents again and escape. Interestingly weird.

Fun fact: when the false mother turns into her real self she looks just like Terri Hatcher, who voices the mothers.

4/10